Just Give me Jesus...

Yesterday was one of those days that I am not proud of.  And sadly I'm not making excuses for myself because I have none. This morning during my quiet time I found myself seeking some serious forgiveness from my precious Savior because yesterday everything that I was dealing with (that really isn't that big a deal) became a lot bigger than it really was. I let it effect everything and my day all of a sudden yesterday became all about me. If you know me well you know that this is not what I am about and I don't.....no let me rephrase I won't let it become about me. I turned into someone that I was not proud of and when it was pointed out to me that was really hard. 

I don't want to be that girl who is all about herself. That girl who's emotions are based on her circumstances, who's joy is found in her situations, who finds her identity in her friends or her job. I desire to be a girl who is so in love with her Savior that His love and joy is all that people see when they come into contact with me. That He is enough for those days when I feel alone but I'm not because He is all that I need. 

I learned some major things about myself yesterday. Things that are going to change because they make me more like Him and less about myself. I did, I fell short yesterday.....real short but thankfully His grace is sufficient and His mercies are new every morning. Today as I start my day He is enough, He is all I need, & He is all I want. Just give me Jesus. 

Under God's Big Top is Coming Soon!!

In two weeks we are starting a new theme in GiGL called Under God's Big Top! Our team is right in the thick of planning out this theme and I am super excited! I think the kids will LOVE it and it will be so fun to tell them about Jesus' love through this circus theme! More pictures to follow once we kick off on September 13th...I just wanted to give y'all a "sneak peek". My room is going to look something like these pictures below!!!

Summer Reflections...

School started back yesterday which means to me summer 09' has officially come to a close. *sigh* Working at a church your summers fly by pretty fast going from camp to camp and doing three weeks of VBS! It is so much fun and has become my favorite season of this job! God did some big things this summer in my life and in the lives of many people around me. It was so neat to watch Him move in the lives of students at Beach Retreat & Next Level Camp and to have the blessing to start planting seeds in the lives of preschoolers during Vacation Bible School. To top it off I got to have a little R&R when I took a much needed vacation to Kennebunkport, Maine over the Forth of July! I hope you all had as an eventful summer as I did....until next year!!

Beautiful Maine...

Boston....

Next Level Camp.....

Vacation Bible School....

Beach Retreat 09'....

Next Level Camp 09'....

Last week we took our fifth and six graders to Next Level Camp! It was my first time to go and I have to admit it was harder than I thought but so much fun! I had a cabin full of 17 sweet girls going into the 6th grade! It was so neat to watch God show up and do huge things in the lives of these kids! It was such a great way to end the summer with the Team Kid Staff and some of my closest friends! Here are some pictures from the week!!

Worship

Next Level Camp Friends!

Ultimate Frisbee

Ain't no party like the Holy Ghost party...super fun glow stick party to close out the week!

Morning Chapel..

Car Ride up there...

An Audience of One...

When I was around three years old we were eating lunch at Kippy Lodge after church with all of our friends. All of a sudden there was a little girl on her tippy toes, dressed in her Sunday best, trying to reach the microphone to sing along with the band on stage. That little girl was me. I guess you could say I was born for the stage...my family says that any time there was one growing up I was on it. I can vividly remember my first "big girl" show at the age of six. Performing as one of the orphans in Annie....I guess you could say I was hooked. I have been performing ever since.

Last night I was having a conversation and was super convicted about my motives when it comes to being on stage. Performing in my opinion is one of the most vulnerable things a person can do. You are putting yourself out there for everyone watching to judge and form their own opinion....but am I doing what I do for them? That answer is so simple but difficult to practice....no. I am not performing for man but for an audience of one.

More than I'd like to admit I find myself getting caught up in what the adults in the room are thinking when doing GiGL. Did I hit every note, every step, the list could go on. But then I end up kicking myself because I have so lost sight of why I do what I do. The kids. It isn't about performing, or the adults in the room but showing & telling them about the love of my precious Jesus.

I do what I do becuase of what He's done for me. Because of His love, His grace, & to start laying the foundation in the lives of these kids by sharing His love each week in GiGL. I am not doing what I am doing for anyone's approval but His.

Galatians 1:10, “For am I now seeking the favor of men, or of God? Or am I striving to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a bondservant of Christ.”

Next Level Camp...

Tomorrow we are headed to Carolina Creek for Next Level Camp....that is our fifth and sixth grade ministry here at Second Baptist. Please be praying that The Lord will move in the lives of the students, leaders, and staff! I've never been before so I am super excited about wrapping up my summer with this camp!

I'm Learning....

To embrace my flaws*I'm going to let people down*even those I love the most in life*and that's OK*His timing really is perfect*His grace is enough*I'll never be perfect*To be thankful for refinement*I love big and that's alight*To serve others and put them before me*I don't always have to be busy....rest is good*I'm in desperate need of my Savior*The way the world says it has to be isn't always right*People can be down right mean*love them anyway*To zoom out*I'm a constant work in progress (Praise The Lord)*

Learning to Zoom Out...

If you know me at all you know that I struggle with zooming out. I tend to get stuck on one little thing and find myself wrestling back and forth with whatever it is. By failing to zoom out I slowly find myself making that issue much bigger than it is. And just being real I find myself not trusting The Lord with my whole heart because I am wanting to hold on to and control what I am zooming in on. When in reality I need to rest in the sweet promise that my God is a good God who will give me everything I need. I mean He already has and He is continuing to do that everyday of my life. His plan is perfect and He is orchestrating every step in in His precious and perfect timing.

This road is not an easy one for me to walk down but as I'm learning to zoom out He is refining me in some major areas of my life. I am learning lessons right now that I know I will hold near to my heart and come back to throughout this journey He has me on. In these lessons He is molding me into the woman He wants me to be. I am so thankful that He's not done with me yet & continues to teach me these precious lessons as I walk this road with Him. I am also so thankful for the people He's placed in my life that are better at zooming out than I am. That they can be a constant reminder that it is so important to remember to zoom out and see what The Lord is doing in my life and that it is good & so much bigger than I could ever imagine. I know I learned that lesson today and am so thankful for it, thankful that He is doing a new thing in my life and refining me into the woman He wants me to be.

Authentic Relationships....

This morning Chip Ingram was our guest pulpit speaker here at Second Baptist Church. I must confess that sometimes being on staff it is hard for me to concentrate during the sermon as my mind is going through my check list for 11:00 GiGL but this morning I was able to just sit, soak, and focus on what he was saying. He was talking about authentic community and how that doesn't just mean sitting in a Sunday School class or being apart of a small group. Yes those things help but they are not the core of authentic relationships. Here is how he defined authentic community. "Authentic community happens when the real you shows up, meets real needs, for the right reasons, in the right way." Simply put....authentic relationships are not about me, my needs, or waring a mask. They are real, raw, selfless, and so, much more.

Something I was convicted about this morning was wearing a mask & to let the love you show be sincere. I often find myself trying to be everything to everyone but The Lord is refining me of this very thing right now. I am learning that I can not be everything to everyone. That I am me and that's OK....take it or leave it and if you don't like it I'll be OK....really I will. If you know me well you know that six months ago I would not have said this but I am so thankful that I can now say that. Chip explained that if we wear a mask people can not see who we really are & people can't see who you really are if you are wearing a mask.

I do, I so badly want to be a girl who is authentic and real. Someone who shows the true love of her precious savior through the way she treats the people she comes into contact with everyday, and the love that they see is genuine and real. A girl who puts others needs in front of her own and who puts others first. And even though that love may not be given in return a girl who can still love. Authentic realationships is where its at and is where I desire to be. So I challenge you to walk the road of authentic relationships with me....somedays it may be harder than others but as Christians that is what we are called to do.