A Light...

This morning my sweet friend Julie spent some time praying for me.....when we got done she told me that she saw a lantern swinging back & forth in a dark place.

Thank you Jesus.

I must confess I have really been wrestling with The Lord this week on being a light. Even though my prayer has been that Jesus would shine through me....there has been a catch. Although I desire to shine for my sweet Jesus I have wanted it to be on my own terms and guidelines.

Here we go again Joy...how many times do we have to learn this is not how it goes...apparently I am still learning this lesson...

Don't get me wrong...I do desire to be a light for Him even when it's hard....I often find myself longing for it even more during those times.

Here is the catch....and I'm going to be honest-it's out of pure selfishness....I want something in return. I have found myself this week asking one specific "why question"....why Father do I have to be a light for others at my expense?

Now this is where The Lord totaly kicked my tail & broke me....this is when I should be thankful and rejoice in the pure & simple fact that I get to be a light for others....even when it's hard. That The Lord can use me through Him to bless others and cause life change...& that I am so missing out on the blessing if I am expecting anything in return. It's not about me but showing our precious Savior to others & for that I am so unworthy. Unworthy of Him using me in big and powerful ways & yet He still chooses to do so.

What a humbling thought.....

Matthew 5:14-16 "You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven."